The Death of Freestyle Eating

Before we get too far into this we need to get real. Its time to get your brain in the game. As you probably already know, managing the thoughts and behaviors that keep you overweight is the true challenge. It is more how you eat rather than what you eat that should be your focus. Unless you alter some basic beliefs and behaviors that sabotage your successes, you will always end up back at the beginning. The dismal truth is that 80-95% of dieters gain back most or all of the weight they lost within two years. The ELEM lifestye is the way out of that disheartening statistic. The ELEM diet focuses on the how, not the what.

The cruelest myth of dieting is that you can finish a diet and get 'back to normal' once you reach your goal. "Ta-Da!! I'm done, now I can have PIZZA again!!" Your normal eating is what got you in trouble in the first place. At some level we all know the truth - the reality that you have to change how you eat F-O-R-E-V-E-R to stay at your ideal weight once and for all. Let's call it the Inconvenient Truth of dieting. We know the facts, but we want so much to find some magic solution that we ignore the truth. Diet books and programs make millions by selling us the next false magic solution. Denial is a wonderful thing, but its time to face the facts. The idea of freestle eating - eating all that you want, of whatever you want, whenever you want to - has to go. Bye-bye, kaput, done, gone. Time to GOMO - Get Over it, Move On.

The good news is that you never have to go on a diet again. How you eat on the ELEM becomes your new normal. It really is beautifully simple in concept. I was so mad about the failure of dieting that I vowed to NEVER DO IT AGAIN. NO counting calories, NO rules I would only break, NO weird unhealthy fads!! I knew I had to lose weight, but I had to find a way do it without going on a diet. My strategy was to just start eating like I would need to eat to maintain the goal weight I wanted. Theoretically, my weight should naturally adjust to my goal. Well, it wasn't all that easy, but that is basically what I did.

Your new truth is that you are building a deliberate and intentional ELEM lifestyle. One that fits you, one that you CAN live with. It's not one big huge change that you can't stick with - its hundreds of tiny adjustments that you try on for size and choose the ones that work for you. The more tiny changes you find that work, the easier it gets. Your weight loss will eventually merge into your new slim ELEM lifestyle. What is your tiny ELEM adjustment for today??

The ELEM-6 Diet, Part-13a: Eat Anything at All!

I'd like to chime in on what Lauren wrote below. She mentioned movie popcorn and how she adjusted/compensated for that intentional indulgence. This brings up a couple of very important points I'd like to expand upon. The ELEM-6 Diet has no restrictions whatsoever on what you eat! It only coaches you to be intentional and purposeful about your choices and to eat only a reasonable amount (not rocket science!) of whatever it is, making thought-out adjustments to subsequent meals and/or exercise as compensation. I find this approach very liberating while also encouraging me to be totally responsible for--and mindful of--how much I eat and the amount of exercise needed to match my eating decisions. This is why the ELEM-6 Diet will train you into a way of eating and exercise that you can adopt as a permanent lifestyle--one you've made your very own and are content with. Here I feel compelled to say once more that you can do these mental "calculations"we've alluded to without any calorie counting or complicated formulas. When you become aware of what you are eating, and in what amounts, then you will just know, "I'lll need to eat a little less than usual next meal to adjust for that cookie" or, "I'll need some extra walking tomorrow to offset that muffin." Needless to say, we are not talking about out-of-control binging here, just the normal little indulgences we all will intelligently and intentionally choose from time to time.

Two more points: First, yes, I really do eat whatever I feel like--cheesecake, rocky road ice cream (my favorite!) bread (don't get me started telling you of my love affair with bread!) or just any food I'd like. I just EL! When the birthday cake (mmm...the kind with layers of raszzberry filling) is passed around, I don't make any big deal by saying, in martyr fashion "no thank you, none for me, it's not on my diet." I just go cut my own little slice (Yes, it looks a lonely and rather pathetic little thing, that dinky little sliver being so small (especially if the plates are big).  Nonetheless, I really so enjoy the wonderful sensation afforded me by those two or three bites. I've learned to live with this restriction and not even feel sorry for myself. The silver lining (or perhaps I should say sliver lining) here is that this makes things taste even better and helps me enjoy them even more than when I'd eat two (or three!) big pieces! Since I've allowed myself such a precious little serving, I am very mindful to savor it to the fullest. This is the new way of thinking you will find yourself adopting as you practice the EL part of the plan. Oh--and don't forget the silver-est lining of all--day 7!

The second point: Although I eat whatever I want, I have adjusted the percentage of those foods in my overal eating habits. This is necessary if, like me, are a starchy-food fanatic. I mentioned above my love affair with bread. I think this may have been sparked in me at an early age when my great grandmother would come to our house and make homemade bread. I'd arrive home from grade school and open the door to be enveloped by the warmpth of the kitchen and the intoxicating aroma of freshly baked bread. Her timing was impeckable. When I walked in the door she was just slicing off the heal (my favorite) and she'd slather it with real butter and place it in my anxious little third-grade hand. To die for! Oh,, I see I've gotten carried away. Ahem... yes, "adjusted the percentage..." As I was saying, I've cut back on the bread, pasta and rice and greatly increased the greens, fruits and fiber. Let me explain. Under the rubric of the ELEM-6 Diet, I could very well have kept eating all those starchy foods but I would have had to EM--enough more--to compensate. Possible theoretically, but I don't have 3 or 4 hours to exercise in the morning, I only have about an hour-and-a-half. So, I made a reasonable compromise and changed the composition of my daily diet. Simple as that. I'll tell you more about this--and give you some helpful details--in the days ahead. For now, just remember to begin to be intentional and mindful about the food choices you make. You are in control here and you can do this!

I just love wind chimes and find them enchanting.

THE ELEM-6 DIET Tip for the Day #1

Take advantage of fleeting moments of motivation. One of my challenges is not so much what NOT to eat, but rather it is having decent choices available in my hectic day. Starting my 10-12 hour work day without a plan is to set myself up for failure. It's Sunday morning and I have great motivation (for now), so I'm cooking a big pot of oh-so-healthy chicken & wild rice soup. I'll put it into individual serving Tupperware and it should help me make good lunch choices all week. If you're not into cooking, at least go shopping to be sure that you have good snacks or quick meals ready for the week. For me its low-fat string cheese, apples, carrots & hummus and Fiber One bars. I'm a snacker, so my odds for success go way up if I have something quick to grab that isn't a doughnut.

Another way to take maximize a moment of motivation is to take radical action. Throw out the leftover cookies that have been your downfall all week. Clean out the fridge. Go buy the walking shoes. DO SOMETHING!! Your positive action will build more actions in a similar way that your failures can lead to more failures. Take that pattern and turn it on its head! (Then please share with us what you've done)

THE ELEM-6 DIET, PART 12: No Pain, No Gain

Well, it's time for me to chime in here. I'm Lauren, Allen's sister. Oddly enough, my brother and I have independently arrived at the same destination, a reasonable weight, using the same path, ELEM. As I approached the age of 50, I too had a similar 'come to Jesus' talk with my doctor. She laid out the facts: Cholesterol too high, blood pressure too high, weight 217. I would need to go on medication. I was at risk for heart disease. As I planned for my upcoming hysterectomy, I suspected that the sudden onset of menopause was not going to help the situation. I had my now-or-never moment.

I had become so accepting of the fate of being overweight that it took a blunt, somewhat harsh, appraisal of my health reality to jar me awake. I had become, as the Pink Floyd song says , comfortably numb. As we get to know each other better, I will talk more about that trap - the result of years of constant failure, episodic false successes, and a gradual descent and submission to the false belief that being thin was for other people. Maybe possible for those naturally thin-eat everything they want-hard bodied-lucky ones (let's hate them), but not for me. That false belief dies hard, but on that day nearly eight years ago I decided that it was B.S. and I would fight back. I must, I can, I will.

Today is January 2nd. Millions of Americans are waking up to the hangover of a two-month long holiday food binge. They will rush out to buy the latest diet craze book (what it is this year??) and join a gym that they will attend faithfully for a few weeks. Then they will slip, falter, and give up. That person has been me, and probably you too, many times before. It is not me today. Today I am two pounds lighter than I was on October first. I hover within a few pounds of 150, which is good for my size 8, 5'7" frame. Since October I have traveled on vacation to Reno, had four long-weekend getaways, and have faced an incredible onslaught of restaurant meals, holiday feasts and an endless parade of goodies in the break room at work. I enjoyed it all - homemade cookies, mashed potatoes & gravy, chocolate truffles, champagne....I could go on. I ate, I enjoyed.... and I maintained control.

After many years of living the ELEM lifestyle, I can say that I went through the holidays with NO PAIN and NO GAIN!! I loved it, I managed it, and I didn't suffer. Really. It is not magic, and I am no hero. I have lousy will-power (or, more correctly, won't power). I have every doubt, bad habit, and secret weakness that you do, and then some. I get lonely, bored, and tempted - just like you. I grew up in a world where food was the currency, the tangible love, and the comfort, woven inextricably in the social fabric of my life. Food was my reward, my solace and my celebration. I am no different than you and if I can do it, you can too. Honestly. You must, you can, you will. Say it.

I know it is a little scary to try this again after so many disappointments. I know. I went to my first weight loss doctor at the ripe old age of 12. I have gained and lost literally hundreds of pounds. But there is better way, a final way, and my brother and I have found it. Our ancient secret method. Join us on our journey. What do you have to lose? You deserve it and there is so much to gain - this is a life-altering adventure (and I'm not just talking about your size here).

So go ahead and be fearful and skeptical. So was I. But then find that tiny bit of hope and join us anyway. Do just one thing today to get started. Repeat the mantra - I must, I can, I will. Then, if you really want to go for it, take a walk. You just need baby steps. Baby steps leading in a new direction, towards a new life. Start now.... No pain, no gain.